My Dirty Angel readerxyourboyfriend
by SkullValkyrie101
Summary: Reader x yourboyfriend fanfic reader is in they’re own verison of limbo
1. my hell is a virtual novel

-My Dirty Angel–reader x boyfriend fanfic by skullvalkyrie101

Author:Your boyfriend belong to @invertedmindinc/@yOurb0yfriend Also

Warning:this fanfic contains graphic Themes as suicide,stalking and sexual content noncon/con if you

are tiggered by the following or you're underage do not read viewer Discretion is advised!

Chapter 1: my hell is a virtual novel nightmare/follow the light of...the tv?/hhhhuuuuhhh!?

Hey i'm (y/n) (y/l/n) and i'm pretty sure i'm in hell well or is it limbo i can's fuckin' tell anymore i slouch at the counter resting my elbow on it as i wait for someone to either order a coffee with a complicated name or complain 'i didn't order this' 'you call this coffee' and i throw a sugar packet at 'em blah blah whatfuckingever and fuck this box stop copying what i'm thinking it dibbled out my exact thought as if to say 'fuck you you can't stop me' i give a heavy sigh of aggravation at my predicament did i fail to mention i'm dead, i'll explain exactly three mouths ago i was in a very bad place in my mind i guess you could say in life i was 'rather' depressed , disconnected , alone i felt as though i had no reason to live i was sure no one would miss me i know my brother wouldn't, my body was like it was on autopilot when i reach for my sleeping pills from the bathroom cabinet, unfortunately i wouldn't have the chance to off myself cause someone ultimately beat me to it, the only warning i got was a masked face in the mirror, it happened so fast i didn't even feel a thing, i may have been a 'tiny' bit distracted

when i awoke i was in a room i didn't recognize i gasped and scanned the bedroom in alarm, the wallpaper was white littered with little pink hearts, the closet had double doors that were a dark wood color, a midsized tv , a desk with a laptop that was also covered in hearts that definitely wasn't mine and the bed i was laying in wasn't familiar either it was purple with light purple to match the blanket i was wrapped in was a hot pink with dare i say it even more hearts i didn't have time to ponder where hell i was for the bedroom door swung open, revealing a woman i definitely definitely didn't recognize she had short dark hair a heart shaped face brown eyes a turned up nose plump lips and her body had a curvy shape to it and wearing some kind of waitress uniform that was red with white accents on the edges she had a sweet friendly smile on her face "good morning sleepy head "

"w-who are you!?"

she cast me an astonished look "are you kidding me roomie, it's me sally your roommate." putting her hands on her hips "are you feeling okay?" she asked her eyebrow rised "i-i'm not sure" i shakely answered then i noticed the oddist thing a large transparent rectanglar floating box that spelled out exactly what i said "hey what's this thing?" pointing at it as it copied me again "uh what thing?"

i pointed at it again "That thing" she look at me like i was losing my marbles i was starting to think i was , "i don't see anything, are you feeling okay?" she sounded concerned, i scratched my head unsure, what the hell was going on she took my hand pulled me to my feet

"com'on i made breakfest, you'll feel better after you eat something" as she guided me to what looked to be a living room where there was a couch a tv and a round dining table that a steaming pile of pancakes still hot the sight made my stomach growled "your welcome" she said condescendingly as she sat down fixing herself a plate i sat and proceeded to do the same may as well eat something, after the 4th or 6th pancake "i gotta get to work, you probably should too" checking her watch "huh work?" i blinked in confusion "uh yeah ? The coffee shop remember." looking very credulous at me i can only imagine how dumbfoundead my face was

"what's with you today and do not tell me you don't remember the way there either." she crossed her arms "no?" drewing invisible circles on the table with my finger "but just for fun where would i find it ?" her palm met her forehead and groaned and irritatingly explaned to me the location of said coffee shop and other places i asked as annoyed as she was explaining i was just as annoyed for asking her but each place she told me didn't sound familiar, the coffee shop was under the name 'woke up cafe'

"You all that?" she asked "i think so" pileing the new info in my head "good if you do get lost for 'fun' check your phone on map app" my phone ? I start searching my pockets for it "*sigh* it's on your nightstand" rolling her eyes "oh heh heh" scratching my head " sigh i gotta go now or i'll be late, your keys are in the bowel and remember to lock the door"

'blem' she was gone leaveing me with questions then answers, well i may as well go to this 'coffee shop' maybe i'll find someone i know there, maybe get some answers to why i'm living with this 'sally' and how am i working at this 'woke up cafe' cause i don't recall, am i suffering from amnesia is that why?

I only hoped someone anyone could tell me what's going on "sigh" oh whatever i went to retrieve 'my phone' from the nightstand the seemed to be free of any hearts till i saw a small baby one in the corner of the wood, the phone case was a light pink with black dots, well at least they're not hearts, maybe i got into one of my drunk stupors that thought 'hearts' that would explain the interior design

i shook my head questions for later i guess, sliding the phone in my pocket i felt around the other pocket for my thermos and took a sip i put it back walk back to the front door, now where did she say the keys were, oh right a bowl there near the door was a stand with a glass blue bowl it was seethough in middle laid a small set of keys after picking them up i noticed a large tag with my name and there were three keys in total the one that looked like a house key had a pink heart with the word 'home' etched in the metal

oh goody another heart i sighed again and slipped out the door

however i would not be prepared for what i would encountered outside.

The first thing i noticed as i grabbed the railing was the sky it looked off like it didn't even look like sky it was like a painter's impression of sky like a oilpainting i shook my head , did i hit my head or something, then i made the mistake of looking down, and was suddenly aware of how high i was and how low the ground looked below, how fuckin' high in the air am i ?! i turned to the door i came out of '3' followed by a dark smudge i placed my hand on the three lonely and filthy just like me ,i looked back to the ground below, maybe this just the third i hoped, i grimaced and slowly and carefully climbed down the stairs and counted from point A to point B, i took some more calming breaths and counted seven floors, oh christ on a stick why, why the 7th floors, i hate heights, am i being punished ? my feet finally met the sweet ground i gave a great sigh of relief

"ok no more fuckin' around" i pulled out 'my phone' for the directions sally told me about, hey has the grass alaways been this bright green? In fact everything else looked off as well, the colors were too vibrant, the sidwalk too perfect, the scenery too nice it was down right unnatural, maybe i'll see my doctor after this cause i think i'm loseing it more then usual as i looked at the box that won't dissipate i thought, i took a fast walking pace the walk on the sidewalk was too smooth as i took my steps, the sidewalk i remembered was jagged cracked and uneven this isn't righ- then i stumbled on one part of the concrete that wasn't quite leveled, okay that's a little better, i steadied myself, something caught my eye someone slumped against a building their back flushed the concrete wall his head and face were obscured by a dark hoodie head down giveing the impression off the air of depression his legs were sprawled out in front of him, is he alright i shook my head doesn't matter not my problem as i tried to continue walking my guilt came to bite me

(you're just gonna leave just like that he could be dying) i don't even know him or her, i was still unsure of their gender (that Should't matter ya know why don't you run into incoming traffic ya piece of shi-) i turned back not sure what i could do but i was gonna try anyway, i crouched down in front of him "hey are you alright?" his head was bobbing so i wasn't sure heard me i was about to ask again till came very shaky "i-i'm...f-f-fine" he stuttered out his voice was so scratchy and hoarse like he hadn't spoken in years, i pulled out my thermos and held it out in front of him

"here drink this, don't worry it's just water" i waited for him to take it he shook his head "n-n-no t-thank y-y-you i-i'm f-f-fin-"

"you're not fine you sound like you were eating chalk just drink it you'll feel better, trust me" i wagged the container makeing the liquid slosh his head finally turned up at me i saw one dark blue eye widen at me "it's...you.." and something else i could't quite hear

"hmmm?" makeina a confused sound was about to ask what he said but then he took the water and chugs down every last drop wow shit he must've been more thirstier then i thought i proceeded to stand

" listen sorry to cut this short but i gotta get going"

i started turn "Wait!" he grabbed my wrist stopping me in my tracks "yes? What is it?" riseing my eyebrow at him

"w-what about y-y-your thing?" holding up the thermos and keeping his head down avoiding my gaze

"nah you keep it i got other ones" at least i hoped i did, and he looked like he needed it more then me

"y-you s-sure?"

"yeah" i tried walking away but i was being hindered

"could you um..let go now Please." he looked at his hand still clasped around my wrist "oh S—shit s-sorry" finally letting go i sighed and gave him a polite smile and i wave him goodbye

i made my way to a crosswalk where there a bus stop and i heard the wonderful sound of civilization i saw a man his back turned to me and he had a phone to his ear i absentmindedly bumped into him not paying attention he snapped around almost violently "WATCH WHERE You're going" he screeched "sorry i mean to-" i gasped and clasped my hands over my mouth at what i saw the man had no eyes, no nose, and no mouth to speak of, he didn't have a face in fact none of the people in the crowed walking ,talking and sitting at the bus stop also were faceless i started to hyperventilate "hey are you alright?" and in my panic i ran not sure where to i was so frighten that my barin just turned off i think one of 'em tried to touch my shoulder but i flinched away, oh god oh fuck i've lost it for real this time, what the hell is- "HEY LOOK OUT !!!" one of them screamed at me as i saw and heard a large bus it's lights flashing, oh god this is it, i shut my eyes and held my hands up anticipating the blow, but after a couple of minutes it never came i could't even hear the bus anymore actually i could't hear anything, not the bus,not the even the faceless people, just dead silence and my heavry breathing, i was still afraid so i slowly opened my eyes one at a time "what the hell?!" it was completely dark the bus, the street , the scenery , and the people were gone it was like somebody took all them away and left nothing but dark nothingness oh god was i haveing a episode?

"Hello is anyone there please...answer me" i called out but i was met with only more unsettling silence till i heard a very soft "Over here" I almost missed it sounded just like a child

i ran towards the direction it came from then i saw a soft glowing light that slowly got brighter the closter i got to it, was is that? When i got toe to toe to it, it took the shape of a small little girl she glowed as bright as a nightlight her eyes glowed green while the rest of her glowed a light yellow

"w-who are you?" i asked shakingly she made a sad sound and softly and sadly "you poor soul, you are trapped in a cage that's not your making, a prisoner of fate"

"what?" my voice came ghostly as she continued

"they must've caught you when you were just drifting, This truly is a unjust retribution that has been placed on your shoulders, your chances are almost none, but if i am able to reach you, there may be a possibility open to you"

yep it's official it was a long time coming but i've finally lost it

"You seem to not understand what i'm saying do you, please look upon this" with a wave of her hand a great big tv emerged from the ground

i stared at the screen not sure why all i could see was static at first but the picture slowly become clearer and clearer till i finally saw myself in my bathroom reaching inside the cabinet, oh yeah i remembered i was going to kill myself wasn't i? I watch myself take the bottle out and stared at it then the screen charged to two masked men rummaging though my stuff, are you kidding me i was being robbed "psst i think i hear someone's in there" one whispered pointing at the bathroom door, the other nodded "i got this" holding a baseball bat then quietly open the and to my horror i watched helplessly as the bat came domn on my head and (y/n) on the screen fall to the tiled floor with a thud and blood poured out of my head like a fountain

"dude i didn't tell you to kill 'em" masked man A yelled "aw shit man, let's get outta here" the screen turned back to static

all the air i had left me and my knees hit the dark ground losing the strength to stand, "i'm...am i..." as i found i had difficuly speaking as though my tongue was made of clay

"'dead' yes, i'm sorry (y/n)"

great killed in a 'breaking and entering' gone wrong and not only that on the day i planed to kill myself how ironic i can hear my mother's disappointment from here i bet my brother's just haveing a ball with this

the worst part is i had a suicide note prepared sigh what a waste of time

"am i ... is this hell?" looking back at her

"no purgatory"

"this is purgatory" i gestured around the emptiness

"no, this place is a in between of existiong and nothingness almost a dream space if you will i pulled you in so we could talk" said matter a factly

"i see...but the place i was before you pulled me in, that was purgatory?" i slowly stood up

"yes and no"

"huh?"

"There isn't just one purgatory there are infinite think of them as levels each one significantly different then the last each housing millions of souls you had the bad fortune by them"

souls? Then i remembered the faceless people and sally why did she have her's and they didn't "those people ... is that gonna happen to me?!" oh god i felt another panic attack coming on

"no, Souls that lose their conviction their individuality become faceless they're lost themselves , so please listen to me" she took my hands into her's "they love playing sick twisted mind games they will use your pain against you so no matter how painful no matter how tragic don't forget yourself, in your pain holds your truth, it is what will keep you so no matter what don't look away,"

my mind was in a shamble of questions " who's 'they'?" i demanded

before she could answer me a ominous sound filled the nothingness like a siren then the ground shook violently like a earthquake then the whole area glowed a horrifying red

"oh no they found me!" she shook her head in dismay

"who's they, and what's happening?!" i screamed trying to keep myself steady

"there's no time, you must find the angel of death that they have enthralled in their game of torture, he is the key, you'll know him by this symbol" oh good more convoluted bullshit she waved her again and in the middle of the static of the screen appeared a misshapened heart that had a jagged line in the middle on one side black the other white and in red was the word 'yours' right in the middle as it flickered in and out on the tv

"key? key to what goddamnit, how am i supposed to find him with that !?" as i shook her but she was like a mannequin her eyes were like static they were there one sec and gone the next

"S--so-rry --ere's n-- -ime you mu-t fin-d him" her voice came in and out like a out of tuned radio

and then like i wakeing from a dream i got yanked forcibly backwards causeing me to fall right on my ass on the grassy curb i then heard a loud honk of a bus and the babel of people " THE FUCK ARE YOU CRAZY" the one that pulled out of the street yelled followed by "are they alright ?" and " should we call somebody?" i was preoccupied catatonicly shell shocked, dead ? Angel of death? Key, key to what? And who's 'they'? What do they want , And what do they plan to do to me?

"Oh my god...(y/n)? (y/n) is that you?" said a brown haired man interrupting my internal questoning he was faceless as well except he wore a dark green apron it had some kind og logo of a coffee cup followed by the words 'woke up' and a tag that said 'manager' he rused over to and crouched down

"are you okay (y/n)"

"y-yeah i-i-i'm fine"

and that was roughly my first day of purgatory at least i think it was, depends on how souls are processed i guess cause i really don't remember

fun fact time here runs really slowly to where the months feel like years so i guess technically i've been here for three years

for the first mouth i work on blending in and not sticking out cause trying not to notice that the people around you are faceless, is hard specially when they kept asking you what's wrong like you're the crazy one i'm happy to say now i'm some what numb to the faceless

"Hey (y/n) are you alright, you look more surly then usual"

"i'm fine sir,and what ya mean surly?" i said feeling a little indignant

"i wish you'd call me Jess , and you do, quit being a grumpy face" and if he had a face i'm pretty sure he'd wiggle his eyebrows at me This is Jess my boss essentially for a guy who is without a face he's rather expressive

i rolled my eyes and sighed and before i know it he got behind he began tickling me "s-s-stop ha ha ha i--it i ha ha c-can't ha b-breath"

he hands finally ceased their movement releasing me i fall forward on the counter panting "w-what a-are you five?"

"Aha my plan was a success" puffing his chest out triumphant i could punch him right now "are you really okay those circles under your are more noticeable today" his voice sounds worried

"I'm fine really i just ain't sleeping well" i lied, my wild goose chase is the reason for my sorry state who know trying to find a angel would be such hard work for last couple of weeks or so every time i was so close to finding that angel just missing him by a hair i thought i might have better luck at night so i started sneaking out when sally falls asleep but it proved to be fruitless i'm up shit creek and i've got to go on is a stupid two toned heart, thanks for nothing fuckin' glowing girl, stupid convoluted hearts, hearts are now my least favorite thing right now

"hey how about you take off early" patting my back comfortingly

"you sure?" tilting my head at him

"yeah i got, this but you so owe me" with a playful tone for a guy who lacks a face he really is a sweetheart

i nod at him and walk to the changing room after i changed i powered walk to the door and waved goodbye

"take care of yourself (y/n)"

i walk along the walkway to the park i didn't feel like going 'home' just yet i went passed the popular areas that were littered with faimilies of faceless to my favorite secluded spot it's the only place that doesn't feel artificial and it's the only place where that damn box can't follow me i think it's cause there's less reception here i'm not too sure

i flop right on to the bench and leaned my head back close my eyes and just let my mind drift and i listen to the sounds around me and for a moment i can pretend that everything's alright and i'm at peace and that tiny piece of tranquilly is enough at least for right now

I nearly fall asleep till i felt a weight shift on the bench and a hand touch my shoulder i sanp my eyes open and whacked the unknown hand away nearly jump outta my skin "the fuck?!"

"whoa! Hey, take it easy, it's just me." holding his large four fingered hand up defensively, the unknown individual was definitely male he was skinny really skinny lanky even he had grey skin not just grey either but the literal color maybe he's sickly and oddities didn't stop there, his face or rather his head it was as round as a vollyball he had two large expressive eyes a large mouth with very sharp canines but no nose to speak of his voice and expression gave off the impression being timid or docile he was wearing a vest like hoodie a dark blue half sleeved shirt and black pants and black shoes to match

"you're a jumpy one, aren't ya?" a slight worried smile crosses his features,

how the fuck did i not hear him coming i would have at least heard foot steps, i kept my eyes on him unsure of his intentions he seemed to have a simpiler idea,his eyes not once not straying a inch from me i noticed his eyes had such dark circles around his eyes jeez does this guy not sleep or something maybe it's eyeliner

he continued to stare at me for what felt like hours, not standing for this deafening silence anymore

"sorry you uh startled me" sitting myself up right so i wasn't dangling on the edge

He gave a relieved smile "soo" he drawled out as he casuallly inched a little closer

"Are you waiting for a family member or a friend?" he asked scooting even closer

Is he getting closer to me, and why is he talking to me like he knows me i forced myself to remain calm, it's okay (y/n) calm down i'm sure there's perfectly reasonable explanation for this over friendliness from a complete stranger

"seems kind of odd for you to be sitting here all alone like this and far away from the jogging track."

i rise my eyebrow at him, is this 'normal'? i've been in this virtual novel version of afterlife so long i can't tell anymore

"no, just relaxing, got off work early"

my tiredness has been replaced by paranoia, he doensn't seemed to have any malicious intentions but i've been proven wrong before my dear 'darling brother' taught me that the hard way, maybe it's a little unfair to judge him right off the bat, he hasn't even done anything...yet

"hey are you okay? you look really tried."

Look who's talking

"i'm fine, *sigh* it's been a couple disappointing weeks" Stupid wild goose chase i use to be great at finding people

he gaves me a pitiful look like he's sorry for my troubles

i give him a slight smile to put him at ease it seemed to have worked as his shulders relaxed and a sweet sincere and real smile crosses his face.

My heart slightly fluttered Ok he's kinda cute for a guy who's head could pass for a beach ball, a grey beach ball

"L-look i know this is sudden, very sudden but if your free time extends through out tonight, can i have the pleasure in takeing you out to dinner?"

he scoots himself right next to me now our hands practically touching, nope this is weird, he is weird.

"huh? What, why?" i stammered out i don't know what kind of explantion i would get for this blod yet idiotic request, he doesn't even know me.

"Well i'm your boyfriend ." he said matter a factly looking more bold all that timidness that was there seemed to disappear a wide smile on his face giving me a better look at his fangs

Boyfriend?! My eyes wide as dinner plates

"isn't that why you're here?" looking at me like i was the one confusing him

i had a good feeling that things were about to get even more complicated from here on out


	2. Blue

-My dirty Angel by Skullvalkyrie101

Chapter 2: Blue 

Sometimes i feel like i'm on the cusp of a harrowing excursion like i did something horrible in a past live and the powers that be send me shitstrom after shitstrom even now even in the afterlive i still feel like they're still punishing me, knocking me down a peg i like to say every experience has made me stronger but it's also made me bitter, mean, harsher even, i've been told in no short terms to my face that i'm difficult to love and i'm fine with that, great even that works for me or at least well most of the time, relationships just...aren't my thing so can someone explain to me how the fuck is this happening to me right now?!

Boyfriend? When the fuck did that happen? I back away pulling my hand away from his as though it was fire "WHAT??NO!!" i scooted far away from him his eyes widen in great surprise possibly due to my sudden yell my lip curled in disdain i kept my eyes on him in case he tried 'anything' funny he sat there and stared at me for a bit and slid his hand away as well 

"oh... i see, Doesn't make much sense why you're here and not want me." his eyes turned to the ground his face contorted in pain, the look pulled at my heart, oh god i really am a piece of shit aren't i, now regretting my words maybe i should've been gentler with my wording, i should probably go before i hurt him more then i have.

I start to get off the bench and make my leave thinking that it was the end of it "Where are you going?" he said standing up from the bench holy shit i notices our height difference almost immediately as he stood in front of me, he's tall really Tall feeling really small at the moment my head only meeting at the place between his chest and stomach meet i'm a measly 5,2 what is he 6, 7 shit i don't know , his face springing right out of it's sorrow state to where it was a mix of feelings "yeah i gotta get going home ya know it's gonna get dark soon" i lied it actually wasn't that even that late yet i just really wanted to get away from this 'situation'

"Oh, really? Maybe i can walk you then?" as tried to reach for my shoulder i flinched away from his touch "n-no thank you, that's alright i can walk by myself just fine" i said not wanting to hurt his feeling but also not wanting to be alone with him maybe i'm just being paranoid but i just can't help it 

"but it's DANGEROUS to walk alone at night anything could happen to you, you could get jumped or ra..." he stopped mid-sentence looking very uneasy and cleared his throat uncomfortably "please" with a frightened smile "please let me walk you home i wanna make sure you're safe" he said trying his best to look friendly but failing his dark blue eyes giveing off a shaky sense of paranoid fear as he awkwardly rubs his left arm 

"listen you're nice but i don't know you and i feel a really (creepy) off vibe from you" his awkward smile turned upside down into a very sad look 

"Off but but" he mumbles his hand grabbing the front of his shirt to where his heart is,

"but I lo-"

"i'm sorry i gotta go!" cutting him off as i dash away as i ran i took one last look over my shoulderto see if he gave chase he did not he simply stood there his eyes to the ground looking so anguishly heart broken like someone just ripped his own heart out and tear it apart 

yep it's official i really am a piece of shit i fled before the guilt swallows me

feeling much like a deflated balloon i wandered around aimlessly not sure what to do with myslef, shit i feel so guilty i may as well throw myslef off a cliff for all the good it'll do me 

"Sigh" still what was he thinking though some guy claims to be your boyfriend and asks you out of the blue that's werid right? The fuck was he expecting to happen, he have been a sexual predator for all i know, my mind trails back to his hurt expression and i falter, i should've been kinder, nicer used my wording more wisely

"sigh OW" i hissed in pain as i walked right into a large sign it was blue surrounding the border with the words 'flowers for days' with large rose around them and a arrow pointing at a large colorful door ah it's a flower shop i look to see it's right across the coffee shop and the diner almost in between them giveing a great view of both places i think sally tried to tell me about this place and how we need flowers for the apartment i don't really like flowers all that much so i scuffed at her, 

well as i look at the door i may as well check it out for myslef as i entered i'm immediately hit by the pleasant smell of the greenery within the store the shop was covered in a soft colors of every kind of flower and plants i'm glad even with being dead i have my other senses thank goodness a batch of dark red roses caught my eye as i walked over to them i reached out to a large one as i just about to pick it out of it's holdings a unknown hand brushed against mine i quickly flinched my hand away and turned rapidly to the owner of the hand holy shit it was him the round headed stranger from the park i felt the wave of guilt and regret wash over me as i saw him, oh god ah man why here why now oh fuck you, unlikely coincidences what did i do to you i cursed silently

"Oh fancy seeing you here" he beamed upon seeing me haveing completely opposite reaction from what i was expecting pulling out the rose i was about to pick up 

he..he didn't follow me here did he? My paranoia kicking in Nah pah no that's ridiculous who would follow some ramdom person into a store heh..heh even in my head i didn't sound to sure 

"I didn't know you shopped here too" he smiled brightly 

"i don't not really" i squeaked 

"listen um..." as i scratched my head nervously 

" you um...didn't follow me here..did you?" i sounded like i was asking him about the whether with how small my voice was 

"What? Of couse not" looking a little hurt 

i could very well be wrong and that this is just a missunderstanding 

"i come here often almost everyday, ya know" 

"sorry i didn't mean any offense" i said sheeishly 

he seem to understand as he looked at me, fiddling with the rose with a pleased smile on his face 

"i love flowers this little shop is the only one around so i come here everyday to see what new bouquets they got and if they have any on sale" he smiles even more warmly

a warm blush spread across his face "i'll admit that i sometimes catch a glimpse of you sometimes through the diner window, most times at the coffee shop and other times..."he cleared his throat "other t-times i see you walking to the park on t-that lonely bench..." his eyes turned sad "you always looked so sad and lost...i always kept meaning to walk up to you...talk to you make you smile, laugh even...but i..i" his voice shook and took a deep breath

"i lose my nerve every time every single time." his drooped sadly i remained quiet and listened intently as he continues 

he runs his hand across his "god i really am pathetic, aren't i." runing his hand across his face

"i'm sorry, i'm not good at this, i just..." grabbing the front of his shirt like a kid with a security blanket and with another deep breath "i just really really like you a lot" his eyes shiny looking like he might cry

"i understand" i said takeing a small step towards him

"you're not good at talking to people i get it" 

he smiled slightly at that looking almost hopeful

i feel bad for judgeing him right off the bat "but trust me you would have hated dating me" giving a sad smile 

His eyes widen "what?! NO i wouldn't!" he yelled slapping a hand over his mouth at the realization he accidentally raised his voice after regaining his composure he continued 

"Are you crazy you're wonderful anyone who can't see that is a dumbass" he cursed

i sighed "no i'm not i'm rude grumpy mean harsh i could go on but what i'm trying to say to you is i'm a huge disappointment" just ask my mother not to 

<strike>**mention i ruin everything i touch**</strike>

he opened his mouth to speak but i pulled up my hand to his mouth before he got a word out 

"it's got nothing to do with you okay" trying to reassure him "relationships just...aren't my cup of tea" 

he looked just as heartbroken as he did at the park, god i am the wrost

"i see.." thumbing the rose in his hand "c-can i at least see you again?" his voice sounding small but hopeful 

quickly holding up his hand "not a date or anything, but just to hang out." giving a skittish smile 

i gave a small chuckle but then something occurred to me 

"wait i don't even know your name, hell i don't think you even know my name" 

his expression turned sour as he frowned eeks was it something i said 

"tshk my name it's a fuckin' joke really" 

sheesh and i thought i had issues with my family he doesn't even like his own name 

"i can give you a nickname if you like?" his eyes brightened at my question 

"would you really?" looking like a little kid at the mall 

"yeah um..let me see" scratching my trying rack my barin to think of something from the characteristics i seen from him so far, flower boy? No i looked at his t-shirt it was a dark blue with a two-toned heart it almost looked like the symbol the glowing girl showed me but not quite this is the fifteenth time i've seen this brand of shirt i don't know how but it slowly become popular the moment i started my search for that damn Angel like someone was fucking with me, com'on (y/n) focus damnit 

i tried dotting down names in my head but none of them felt like they fit, hmm he got really pretty blues eyes maybe...?

"how does the name 'blue' sound?" i asked his whole face broke out into a wide grin and there seen to be a strange happy light in his eyes for a moment i thought i felt my heart flutter at his happy pleased face must've drank too much coffee again

"yeah, Blue b-l-u-e honestly thank you" he said looking extremely pleased a pink shade of blush on his cheeks 

i don't why he looked so happy about it though 25% of people are named blue (i think) practically generic but he made it seem to be the greatest, is it me or is it a bit warm in here?

I pulled my hand for a handshake he seemed confused at first till it finally got the idea grasping my hand gently but firm 

"nice to meet you my name's (y/n)" shakeing his hand 

"nice to meet you too (y/n) my name's Blue"he said giving me a bright actual sincere smile that reached his eyes 

"heh listen i got a day off tomorrow so let's get to know each other, lunch at the diner at 4 sound good?" i asked him i may as take some time off of my search on that damn angel besides from what glow girl told me, i'm pretty sure it's just as trapped as me 

his eyes widen in obvious excitement " i love to 'cough' i mean i'd love to 'platonically'" it was very he was trying to hid his joy and failing badly

"cool um wait one sec" pulling up my phone "could you tell your digits please?" my thumb on the keypad ready to send a text away

his eyes widen in surprise " what? Really i mean sure it's ()()()" 

i puch in the number and i send a text 

"there you go when you check your texts you have my number so you call or text when ever, well not always when ever i have work and sleep" which is amazing who know you still have to sleep in the afterlife 

"heh heh Oh! Can i see you at work too maybe?" looking even hopeful 

"well, you can if you want, i'll be pretty busy but sure."

"Okay" he grins happyly eyes full of happiness and hope, wow he really has beautiful eyes 

"'yamn' ah shit what time is it?" i took a look out the windows my eyes widen when i how dark it was 

"ah shit i better get going see ya" i turned towards the but then felt a tug preventing me from moveing forward i looked down to my hand and realized blue was still holding my i had let go a while ago and i just didn't noticed till now 

"um...could you let go i kinda need that?" pointing at our joined hands 

he blinked at me confused till he looked down 

"oh shit sorry i wasn't thinking" he flushed deep red and he looked down in embarrassment 

"hey it's okay" getting on my tippy toes and touched his shoulder reassuringly

"see ya tomorrow sailor" giving him a friendly wink

"see ya later then." the red on his face was still there but at least he smiled, ok fine i'll admit it he's got a cute smile too.

i made my way back to the apartment through the with my phone light i really don't mind walking at night i actually rather enjoy it, it's only time of the day where the colors look right not all vibrant and bright or digital like but dark i may just be going crazy but sometimes i swear for a tiny sec i see the surrounding from normal virtual to shadowy and decrepit but it only lasts for a sec i could just be tired though 

as i finally made it through the door i sighed heavily ah chirst i feel like i'm gonna fall over 

i really hope sally isn't-

"'moan' yes yes, right there, ah fuck 'moan'" 

oh goddamnit why, well at least she haveing a 'good time'

i quietly crepted to my room arfter locking the door ever sense one of sally's 'dates' walk in my drunk and tried to fondle me in my sleep i just don't feel without first locking my door 

and like the dead i flop right on my bed i pulled something from under my bed 

"noise canceling headphones don't fail me now"

after placing on my head i snuggled my head on my favorite pillow sigh another night a different dream i guess, i wonder if he'll call 

i pondered as my eyelids grew heavy and i dozed off to sleep


End file.
